Magnifiying and Minimizing: Cheerleaders – Do You do This?
Here’s a cheerleading scenario that could happen anywhere: Your friends see you perform for the first time. You bobbled a bit during a pyramid but managed to hold it together. Afterwards, your friends tell you they thought your performance was amazing and they are impressed with you and your squad’s routine. What do you say?
Do you immediately point out every thing that went wrong with the routine? Do you apologize to them for your “terrible” performance? Or do you thank them graciously and enjoy their compliments?
Well, just like Mental Filtering (see last post), Magnifying and Minimizing is another cognitive distortion that is a favorite of perfectionists. In this case, you either Magnify every little thing that was not perfect or you Minimize every thing that was!
Tip: It’s fine to recognize when something does not go well as long as you can do so in an objective way, noting it, and resolving to figure out how to adjust so the problem can be fixed. This is different from ruminating about it.
Tip #2: When someone compliments you, accept it graciously. A compliment is a gift so accept it as such. When you point out what they didn’t see you are spoiling it for them and for you!